“A Today”

A today began with me chewing my lips and applying lip conditioner at such a rate that I’m now using my nails to dig to the bottom of the tube.

On the days I awake and the edges don’t meet, I question my mortality.  And I question the biggest question of all: “What am I doing here?”

I feel a shift in the plates of the earth’s hemisphere.  There’s a little quake that happens within me.  The fugitive events that occur as I go about my day,  hint at a new thought, and I have to slow down to focus on what that thought means to me.

It’s so easy to keep rushing to finish what I’m doing.  And as something unusual gives me a glimpse of itself, I am awe-struck for an instant, and then common sense and inhibition dismiss my opening to the new idea with overpowering statements like,”Oh yeah!  Okay that wasn’t worth stopping what I’m doing to contemplate, or to let my intuition feed on.”

I accept the idea that extra dimensions to thought, and to daily life experiences, come in forms, instants, glimpses, and brief encounters.  These may be interpreted to fuel spiritual and mental, and creative and physical growth.  Clues that pop-up in our intuitive unconscious mind are so time sensitive, any sound, even the vibrations of a split-second, can alter their content and context causing them to instantly disappear, possibly forever.

Learning and practicing to pay attention to these random offerings is more important to me in this time of global cacophony.  To freeze the atmosphere around me long enough to question what I saw, thought, felt, knew, smelled or tasted: What was that!? What feeling did it release, or what new feeling has been invented, just from this moment.  I must learn to consciously practice being mindful if I am to be an observer of the hidden clues being revealed to me for inclusion in my personal narrative, and life’s experience, as these two mold me into the human adventure.

Mary Catherine Bateson, a Cultural Anthropologist, (and the daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson), has been experimenting with two versions of the truth about adults’ interpretations of their life histories:  one of Bateson’s narratives focused on continuity (1) and the other on discontinuity (2).

  1. “Everything I have done has led me to where I am today.”
  2. “It is only after many surprises and choices, interruptions and disappointments, that I have arrived somewhere I could never have anticipated.”

I’m living version 2.  Sweating and swirling through patterns of disruption, dismembered by flux and re-naming myself, at one time, the “Particle Princess”, I have finally come to embrace combining styles of thinking that lead me to discovering a third pattern:  one I can own and personalize as a new style. There is no single way for me to be.

I suggest we search for the exotic, consider ourselves reversible, convertible, blowing this way and that:  be mercurial and THRIVE.

BTW – Today is my one month anniversary of publishing this blog and I’d like to thank all the viewers that visited me here. WordPress is a tremendous community and a magical link to others.  Thanks to the content of other peoples’ blogs I am the recipient of a great amount of personal enrichment.

Bateson has written: “Some versions of humanness are never written down in any form.” Looks like we’re the lucky ones!

Copyright © 2009 Nicole Rigets

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